Today I lost my closest alli(other than my hubby),the first man I ever loved,and the greatest man I have ever known,my dad. It still feels like a dream,like I'm gonna wake up and he'll still be here. I knew this day would come but I didn't realize how soon it would be.I wish Mason could have had the chance to get to know him. My dad was great,he always helped people less fortunate,he did charity work for all kinds of causes,he always made time for me. To me that was the best thing. I could always call him for anything and he would be there. I'm going to miss him so much. Even though he never said it I know he loved me,and I know he thought Mason hung the moon! I am so glad that he did get the chance to see and know his grandson,a gift that my grandmother never received. I am so grateful for all that they have done for me (my mom,dad and my grandparents) and I hope that now I get the chance to tell them all. I feel so terrible that I have tarnished my relationship with my mother so badly that it seems ruined. I don't want things to be this way,I want to get along with my mom,and I hope that now we can. I know my father always wanted that. He tried so hard to make things good and I never would budge. I am too stubborn and I really need to change that. I know he wanted a happy family and I want to make it that way for him,too little too late maybe but it's what he would have wanted,it's gonna take some work but I really want to make it happen. I love you dad. I'm gonna miss you more than anything.
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